Maintaining Balance is a Challenge, Even on a Good Day!

If there’s one key to surviving and thriving during the time you’re caring for a loved one, it is without a doubt taking care of yourself first. Maybe it seems impossible at times, but think of it as an investment. Even as little as 5 minutes a day can help restore a sense of calm and balance to your demanding life as a caregiver.

I think I may actually have taken better care of myself while I was caregiving than I do in my non-caregiving life. At some level, I sensed that I might not make it through if I did not, so I felt an urgent need to make sure that I exercised regularly, ate healthily and got enough sleep (this one was perhaps the most difficult!).

Earlier this summer, I had a health scare of my own, and it was amazing to see how much effort it took for me to get myself back on course with taking better care of my health and myself.

Honestly speaking, I find it hard to fit in all that I want to do for myself (and know I should do) even when I’m NOT caregiving, so I’m very sympathetic about how difficult it is to stay focused on self-care while caregiving.

Just after I had a fainting spell while watering my garden in the hot Texas dusk, I was “seeing spots” for quite awhile, and I felt very weak. A quick trip to the emergency room showed that I was dehydrated and had nearly had a heat stroke. I was fine after a day or two of taking it easy, but for me, it was a somewhat gentle wakeup call to pay better attention to my self-care.

I’d been working quite hard, including lots of business travel. And I hadn’t been exercising, using that time for work instead. I felt like things were out of control, in general. So when I had my little episode, I used it as a chance to refocus on self-care in an effort to get myself back in balance.

Starting with physical health, I focused on lowering my blood pressure, which tends to run a little high (but not enough to take medication for) by:

• Minimizing negative dietary contributors to high blood pressure (red meat, coffee, bacon, alcohol)
• Increasing positive nutritional inputs known to lower blood pressure (lemon-mint-cucumber spa water, fresh beet and pineapple juice, pomegranate juice, coconut water, yogurt with muesli-blueberries-strawberries-bananas)
• Starting daily supplement intake again (Calcium with D, Omega-3 fish oil, vitamin C and a multi-vitamin)
• Increasing “movement” via more walking (30 mins, 3x per week), and everyday morning stretches
• Taking daily blood pressure readings, and doing a “lower-your-blood-pressure” meditation, several times weekly

For emotional health and attitude adjustment, I focused on calming myself down and restoring balance by:

• Enforcing a “no iPhone for the first 30 minutes of every day,” using that time to instead commune with the hummingbirds on the back deck
• Working to shift my internal dialog from a feeling of “I’m overwhelmed and spinning out of control” to “I’m taking control back and regaining my balance”

It literally took 1.5 weeks of me focusing on healthy eating, more movement and daily attention to “doing one thing at a time” before I could feel an internal attitude shift, and I was surprised at how difficult it was. And even though I haven’t met all my goals every single day or week for the past 2.5 months – I’m happy to say that my blood pressure reading today was 115/ 71, much lower than before (it was up to 140/ 82, considered “pre-hypertension”).

When you’re thinking about your own self-care, even if you’re not currently caregiving (but especially if you are!), it’s always good to check to make sure that every day, you are:

• Taking some time – however minimalistic – just for yourself
• Getting enough sleep
• Eating nourishing foods and drinking enough water
• Moving your body for at least 10 minutes
• Listening, reading or watching something that is enlightening

When I think back on it, although I was able to maintain a semblance of balance while I was caregiving, I could probably have managed to do even more for myself. I remember well that I was absolutely stressed out and it was the toughest time I’ve ever experienced – physically, emotionally and even financially. But I can think of things now, nearly 10 years later, that would have helped me immensely and that wouldn’t have taken much effort at all. Things like more stretching and yoga, an aromatherapy diffuser, meditation, my own custom-made smoothies and a few less carbohydrates.

Be brave and experiment with what brings balance to YOUR life!